Being assertive does take energy but on the other hand so does anger and usually there's a better chance of getting what we need or want by being kind but persistent rather than angry and demanding. Of course, we might not choose to be angry, we just are, but in my experience most anger, at a closer look, is really directed towards ourselves.
As mentioned before there's a huge energy in anger and if we can tap into what it is that we care so much about, then we can choose the best way of pursuing it. Of course, we get angry when someone stops us, misjudges us or pushes us out of the way. The question is whether that really is the issue. So rather than pushing back, creating a fight or bad atmosphere we can look for ways to pursue what we want or need without necessarily counting on those who're not enthused in the way we are.
And if we do need something, to approach the person in question with respect and kindness. Yesterday, I made yet another call to a supplier in England whose delivery hadn't arrived after three weeks and who had said they'd get back to me, but after two days hadn't. For my own sake mostly, rather than putting pressure on them I just phoned and explained that it hadn't arrived. As it turned out it had been sent back to them and there was a problem with figuring out the right paperwork and the courier hadn't been able to help them. But they were doing everything they could as they want to be able to continue trading with Ireland.
So I was glad I didn't give out to them for being unprofessional etc. they were obviously frustrated and disappointed themselves that what they thought was the right paperwork turned out not to be. And I know from talking to them that they're doing their best to rectify the situation. With this corona virus going around on top of Brexit confusions at the border there will be delays. Extra kindness has to be asserted😍
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